As the shutters
creeked back
and forth, the rain continued to pounce down on the rooftop. The vivid noise felt like sharp icicles were going to come right through the glass and strike me. We thought this was going to be the worst hurricane we felt in a long time....
Hi Lydia,
ReplyDeleteI was expecting the sentence to sound very pleasing (because of the post title). rain "pouncing" gives a good idea of what it sounded like! I have to admit though, I think the descriptions could be stronger. The writer describes the noise as vivid, but doesn't describe it that vividly and saying that icicles were going to "come" through the glass and "strike" the person.... they could have "crashed" through and "impaled".... I think it could have been stronger in that sense.